I let her

While at a labor day party this weekend the kids were running around the yard, being kids and having fun. One of my nieces, pretty close in age to the peanut, was kicking the soccer ball around with another older niece. I could see the peanut chasing them around the yard, wanting to get in on the game too. They seemed oblivious to her as she went from one spot to another trying to be a “part” of it all. Suddenly I noticed her stop and kind of look down as if she just felt excluded and didn’t know what to do.

My natural instinct was to get up and say, “Include her too please!!”, but I didn’t. I sat and sadly watched her try to figure it out on her own. My heart broke as I sympathized with those feelings of hurt and exclusion. I didn’t want her to experience any of that, not yet. I let her though.

I let her because I know I cannot protect her forever. I let her because I cannot always jump in and be her Saviour. I let her because I know she is going to have to grow up at sometime and there is going to be a lot of rejection in her life. I let her because there is injustice in our world that she is going to have to face on a daily basis in her life and I want her to know how to. I let her because I love her and want her to become a strong woman who can take care of herself when the time comes. I let her go in one small way.

And then that night, I gave her an extra hug or two and I let her know that she is loved.


10 Smile Tuesday

Yep, I totally know I’m just not doing much of the blogging thing lately. It seems like things are just busy, but not really great blog material kind of days. Just living life, if you know what I mean! However, we have had some great smiles lately, so I will continue my smiley tradition, and share them with you. Sorry for the lack of pictures but I really am trying to be more involved in the moment and less behind the lens lately!

1. My husband has off on Wednesdays, so when we woke up last Wednesday he said, “Hey, do you guys want to go to the Children’s Musuem today?” Of course we could not pass that up, so, we went and had a great time! The peanut got to play in the water, the sand, be in a marching band, go down the slides, be a Dino and ride on a carousel. Unfortunately, I didn’t bring my camera (which was not on purpose!) so I didn’t get any of those fun pictures. Trust me though, she had a blast!

2. Unexpected surprises. While at the museum, I hear my name called out, turn around only to see one of my very dearest friends, Claudia, whom I never see anymore since becoming a stay at home mom, standing there. She has a 1 year old and brought him there for his first visit, and it just happened to be the day I was there. Thank you Lord for unexpected surprises!!

3. A date. My husband and I had tickets to go to this outdoor symphony for the past couple of weeks and this was the last week to use them, so we decided to go on Thursday night before the weekend rush. My very good friend Carrie was kind enough to offer to take the peanut so Michael and I grabbed a chicken dinner from Kroger and had a lovely picnic while enjoying some fun music and outdoors!

4. Lost and found. While at the symphony, my husband had my cellphone in his pocket and somehow it fell out. We searched forever, in the dark grass after everyone had left, but couldn’t find it. Of course it was hard figuring out where we sat after everyone was gone. We prayed God would help us to find it as we didn’t want to replace it but it was nowhere and the battery had died. My hubby went back during his lunch hour the next day, praying the whole time, and low and behold, there it was!! Thank you Lord for answering prayers!

5. Sales. On Saturday my father in law gave me a bit of a break while I went to the outlet mall, by myself, which was fabulous. I was able to find some new work shirts and polos for my hubby but my favorite purchases were for next summer. I bought each of my girls matching dresses, and of course cried in the middle of Osh Gosh b’gosh when I realized they were for my “daughters.” Unbelievable that this three will be becoming four in just a matter of months!

6. Come out! Last Wednesday I woke up to the peanut standing by the side of my bed pointing at my belly saying, “Baby, come out!!” I couldn’t help but crack up!7. My best friend. The peanut has been calling her favorite people her best friend lately. She has also used this as a reason to chase the dog under the bed, as in, “But she’s my best friend!!” Well today she hugged my belly and said, “Baby in belly, dat Anna.” She then proceeded to put her face up to my belly and say, “You my best friend.” I almost cried!!

8. The peanut’s favorite question lately is, “What doing?” She also says, “What happened?” (By the way, as I was just writing that she said, “What happened?”!!) Anyway, we were having dinner out the other day and she clear as a bell said, “Daddy, what are you doing?” We were both shocked at the clarity of it when Michael replied, “I’m waiting for dinner.” The peanut then replied in an eye rolling kind of way, “I knoooooow.” Oh, we laughed so hard.

9. On Sunday my husband’s family had a cook out and the guys had a golf tournament. So the girls decided to do a craft and made these adorable shirts for the kids that said, “It’s how family is done.” and then had all the family members sign it. I hope the peanut treasures it as she gets older!

10. On Sunday we went to my parent’s for a labor day picnic. It was so nice to be out by the pool, enjoying the fresh air and family and just having a relaxing time. As a bonus my mom and I went shopping afterward for sales and I got a bunch of stuff for the peanut for next summer (or if she continues on this slow growth trend, the following summer) for way cheap! And it is good quality stuff, you gotta love it!!

What are you smiling about today?